Be Passionate Not Pushy

The art of enthusiasm; finding the knowledge sharing sweet spot

🌸 ikigai 生き甲斐 is a reason for being, your purpose in life - from the Japanese iki 生き meaning life and gai 甲斐 meaning worth 🌸

Have you ever been so passionate about something that you tend to become a little too, well… pushy, by accident? When you're so exceedingly lit up inside that you want to grab everyone you know and shout that they *HAVE* to try this right this second!!?!

I know that's me with AI tools right now. Every time I use ChatGPT or Claude to solve a problem or spark creativity, it feels like actual magic.

I SO want everyone to experience this joy.

Not everyone shares my enthusiasm though with eyes glazing over when I talk prompts and programs.

Some people are understandably expressing concern about the societal impact of AI and others are just too busy to learn yet another new thing.

I just want to help, and it frustrates me heaps when I can’t do that in an effective manner.

When we find something transformative (for me that’s AI, bullet journaling and ikigai illumination on the world of work), we want to share it. However it is important to be aware that enthusiasm can sometimes overwhelm rather than inspire.

When passion becomes pushy

I constantly catch myself in full on evangelist mode when I’m not being self aware, practically cornering colleagues to show how AI could revolutionise their workflow. Their polite nods tell me everything, I'm crossing that line between sharing and preaching.

It reminded me of my early days discovering bullet journaling, telling all my friends about the method and showing them my colourful spreads, not understanding why they didn't immediately rush out to buy a dot grid notebook and rainbow of fineliners.

The line between passionate sharing and pushy behavior is often invisible until we've crossed it.

The more passionate we are about something, the harder it can be to share it effectively. Our enthusiasm can actually create resistance.

Think about times you've been on the receiving end of someone's passionate pitch, maybe it was;

• A friend deep into cryptocurrency trying to convince you to invest

• A colleague insisting their productivity system would change your life

• A family member certain their new diet is the answer to everything

Even if they were right, their pushing likely made you pull back. This is the backfire effect in action, when too much enthusiasm feels like pressure, it often reinforces resistance rather than breaking through it.

Why? Because resistance often stems from more than disagreement, it’s about deeper fears;

1. Fear of inadequacy - Will I look stupid trying to learn this?

2. Overwhelm - I already have too much to learn and do

3. Past experiences - Remember when I tried that other new thing and failed?

4. Loss of agency - Are you saying my current way isn't good enough?

Passion, too, can be deeply personal. When someone resists what excites us, it can feel like they’re rejecting a part of us. That emotional sting can make us push harder, but ironically, the harder we push, the more people pull away.

Instead, concepts like social proof remind us of a better approach. People respond not to being told they should try something but to seeing it quietly succeed for others. Think about the last time you were drawn to something new, chances are it wasn’t a polished pitch that inspired you, but seeing how it worked for someone you trust.

When we focus less on convincing and more on inviting curiosity, we make space for discovery. We can’t push someone to see what we see, but we can craft a motivational pull that lets them explore in their own time.

Balance is needed, learning designers have long studied motivation and behaviour.

The push and pull of learning

Learning design thinking offers some insights here. While we can think of "push" learning (like traditional lectures) as less effective than "pull" learning (self-directed exploration), the reality is more nuanced. Well designed push experiences can create emotional resonance and motivation, that initial spark that makes someone care enough to learn more. Think of an inspiring talk that changed your perspective or a hands-on workshop with an engaged cohort that opened your eyes to new possibilities.

Pull learning comes into play when people are internally motivated to seek out more information; accessing online resources, asking questions or exploring tutorials at their own pace.

Without that initial push to create engagement and emotional connection, many people never develop the motivation to pull deeper.

Effective approaches combine both; create compelling push moments that spark interest and establish relevance, then ensure pull resources are readily available when people are motivated to learn more.

There are many learning design principles I’m reading up on, I asked ChatGPT to summarise a few for your reference;

Effective learning design for adult upskilling draws on established principles that recognise the unique needs of adult learners. Frameworks such as Knowles' Andragogy, Kolb’s Experiential Learning Theory, and Bersin’s Learning in the Flow of Work highlight the importance of relevance, emotional connection, and contextual learning. Theories like Shackleton-Jones' Affective Context Model and Cognitive Load Theory further stress the need for engaging, practical experiences that align with real-world tasks, while the 70:20:10 model reinforces the value of experiential and social learning in workplace contexts. By integrating these insights, organisations can create impactful, learner-centred upskilling programmes.

Using passion effectively

Here's what I'm learning about sharing my enthusiasm more constructively.

Start with curiosity, not conversion - Instead of launching into why AI is amazing, ask questions;

• What parts of your work do you find tedious?

• What would you do with an extra hour in your day?

• What kinds of problems do you wish you had help solving?

Empathy before explanation - It’s easy to forget that resistance often comes from fear of looking foolish or feeling out of control. Acknowledging these unspoken worries can make all the difference. For example, when introducing AI to someone who feels overwhelmed, we might say;

• “I know it can feel like there’s too much to learn. Honestly, I felt that way at first too.”

• “You’re already doing so much, this isn’t about replacing your skills, just giving you a little extra help.”

By validating their concerns, we invite them to engage on their own terms rather than feeling pushed into something unfamiliar.

Share stories, not sales pitches - People connect with personal experiences more than feature lists;

• "I was struggling to write consistently until I discovered..."

• "Remember that project that was driving me crazy? Here's how I solved it..."

• "I made so many mistakes learning this, but here's what finally clicked..."

Make it relevant to their world - Show how it connects to what they already care about;

• For the bullet journal enthusiast - how AI can help with spreads and layouts

• For the report writer - how it can help overcome blocks and give you a structure

• For the busy parent - how it can simplify routine tasks

Create safe spaces to explore - Only when people feel emotionally secure can they open themselves to new possibilities and learning;

• No pressure to commit or continue

• Permission to be skeptical

• Acknowledgment that different approaches work for different people

• Celebration of small wins and experimentation

created in napkin.ai

When we're intentional about how we share our enthusiasm, we can create more meaningful and lasting connection.

Building bridges through mindful sharing

This is where passion needs to be at its most controlled, enthusiasm without pushing. These first moments of exposure to something new are SO important. It's where excitement can bloom or resistance can cement.

Here's what I'm thinking about in creating meaningful knowledge sharing experiences;

1. Start with immediate, tangible wins that feel personally relevant

2. Keep interactions simple and focused, leaving space for questions and natural curiosity

3. Offer clear next steps while maintaining a pressure-free environment

4. Practice patience and empathy throughout the journey

5. Trust in the natural rhythm of push and pull in learning

6. Respect that everyone's path to discovery looks different

Perhaps the key is remembering our own journey. We didn't fall in love with AI or bullet journaling or any other passion because someone pushed us. We discovered it, played with it, and found our own way.

Our role isn't to convert others but to create opportunities for discovery, share authentic experiences and offer support when asked.

Ikigai can seem to be about what lights us up individually, but it's also very much about creating joy and meaning in connection with others. Sharing our passions is one way to build these bridges, creating spaces where mutual discovery and growth can flourish.

When we approach sharing with patience, empathy, and respect, we open up space for discovery. We learn to celebrate the moments when curiosity blossoms, even if the journey someone takes looks different from our own.

Ultimately, the art of sharing passion without pushiness isn’t about convincing others to see what we see. It’s about inviting them to explore their own possibilities and, perhaps, finding joy together in those shared moments of discovery.

That, to me, feels like the heart of ikigai, creating purpose not just in what we do, but in how we connect.

Have you ever struggled with sharing something you’re passionate about? Have you found ways to inspire without overwhelming? I’d love to hear your thoughts and stories in the comments.

Sarah, seeking ikigai xxx

PS - Here are some journaling prompts to explore your own relationship with enthusiasm and sharing;

1. What discoveries have most transformed your life? How did you come to them?

2. When has someone's enthusiasm inspired you? What made it effective?

3. When has someone's pushiness repelled you? What made the difference?

4. What are you passionate about right now? How might you create opportunities for others to discover it naturally?