Don’t get an unusual looking dog if you are an introvert or in a rush!
AKA Does my dog give me a reason for being?
I’m on a mission. I need to beat yesterday’s time. I need to get this dog walk done in under 30 minutes to not be late for work. I turn the corner and there are two people in matching walking clothes, their faces light up to see my dog. I can tell that I am not going to be able to stomp past, so I resign myself to being late, slow down and smile. They then ask the question I am asked most often these days, “What is he?”. This is in reference to my nearly five year old dog, Henry Hound. I will of course now pay the puppy tax before moving on.
My overriding and very childish instinct is to answer, “He’s a dog” but instead I tell the very many people we bump into while out walking, that he is a Bloodhound Collie cross, and agree with them that yes it is an unusual combination, yes he is very handsome and yes he is a good boy.
All dogs are good boys or girls, and for many years I longed for the day that I owned my own home and was able to finally get a family dog. So I completely understand that drive to want to pet all the dogs when you don’t have your own. If you don’t like talking to strangers though, you will need to find walks off the beaten track!
Why did so many people warn us off getting a dog?
Having your own large dog is so much harder than I thought it was going to be. Even with all the research and preparation I had done. I remember blithely answering friends telling us it will be hard work that I know it won’t always be easy, but I’m prepared and it will be worth it. I think you have to lie a little to yourself, much like after giving birth saying well it didn’t hurt *that* much, to invite such a big change into your life.
I love him so much. He quickly became our obsession and the thing our lives revolve around. Dogs are pure souls, and they love you so very much. You feel that sense of responsibility as they are completely dependent on you much like when your children are babies. Children eventually grow up and are able to articulate their needs and wants. That never happens with an animal so it forces you to be more attuned to their behaviours and body language. His happiness is something I worry about a lot, a lot a lot.
Does having a dog make me healthier?
Before having Henry there is no way I would go out for a walk in bad weather, it just wasn’t happening. My Island home is beautiful, but very dark and bleak from November right through to March. However there is no way I can ignore the puppy dog eyes, he sits in the bay window gazing out at the beach below us. He definitely makes me go out walking a lot more. Also over the last four months he has become a big part of my habit stacking behaviours that see me jumping out of bed usually at about 6.15am to go out for a one and a half mile, thirty minute maximum stomp before hitting the shower and getting ready for work. He is much more a creature of habit than I used to be, and now I can’t let him down! He’s my accountability partner. I’ve gone from barely managing even 5,000 steps a day, to pretty much always getting over 10,000 a day and am reaping the benefits of that both in terms of physical health, and the satisfaction of being so disciplined no matter the weather.
There are lots of things though that have adversely affected my mental health due to having him! Our house is terraced, really thick old stone walls, but my dog has the loudest bark and howl you’ve ever heard. He’s not a fan of being left on his own and I don’t want to be a bad neighbour, so we tend to go out even less than we used to, or it restricts the places we can go to, to dog friendly ones. So our sense of connection to friends and family has probably diminished more than it should have and we need to course correct in some way.
As much as I adore the bones of Henry, he is hard work. He has been barked at or attacked by so many dogs over the years, that he has become increasingly reactive and unpredictable, which can make our walks a challenge. He pulls really hard on the lead too and is strong and stubborn, so that can sometimes take the pleasure out of it for me.
On balance I think the love he gives and the motivation he gives me to get out and walk, means he does make me healthier. The positives outweigh the negatives, well, most of the time anyway.
Could my ikigai be dog related?
Given how much I love animals, I do think that there are aspects of it that could be for me. I’m pretty sure that if money were no object I’d have a small farm and rescue animals. However, in terms of a holistic path and a route that includes being paid, I don’t think it is the right path for me at present. I’ve seen some amazing doggy businesses flourish where I live, daycares and the like, but I don’t think that’s for me. Plus given the issues my hound has, I clearly need to work on my training skills! I think having a dog is an important supplement to my path as a companion, rather than as a career option. Henry does give me a reason for being though, in the same way that my family and friends do, as a loving part of my life that motivates me to be a better person as well as being a balm to my soul. He may be a pain in the ass at times, but he’s still my best stinky boy regardless.
I have a Pit cross who is borderline reactive and I completely agree with some of the things you said. She is the best thing that happened to me in the US though, and she made me start loving winter! I don't even mind trudging through snow and ice these days. Dogs are the best, and yours looks adorable!
Ha ha I can see so much of this in our journey to having a dog. The little lies, the feeling prepared until the day they arrive home… I am looking forward to the 10k steps though. There’s definitely two sides to getting a dog but the love they bring is worth all the effort.